How to Tell Your Family You Are a Surrogate

How to Tell Your Family You Are a Surrogate

When you want to become a surrogate mother, it is not an easy task. Along with the numerous responsibilities before, during, and after the surrogacy journey, you will be left with the dilemma of letting your family, children and friends know of your decision to become a surrogate mother for others. Getting all the moral support you can from your family, children, and friends is very important for your surrogacy journey. The moral support your family can give you will help you cope with all the emotions you might feel during pregnancy.

It is important to remember that any pregnancy usually affects those people who are near and dear to you. Your immediate family should be the first ones to find out about your decision to become a surrogate mother. Your husband, parents, and children should be well educated on the surrogacy process. The best time to tell your immediate family about your decision to become a surrogate mother is when you have firmly decided on being a surrogate. Letting your immediate family know the reasons why you decided on being a surrogate will greatly help them understand your purpose and goals. Being truthful with them will help them understand and accept your decision.

Letting your children understand your situation as a surrogate will take a bit of time and patience. Remember that the reaction of your children will depend mainly on what you have told them. Explaining this sort of thing to your children will always call for sensitivity, and most importantly, the truth. You should also consider introducing the concepts and ideas of surrogacy to your children over a period of time, rather than all at once. For example, as you arrange a meeting with the intended parents, you can take the opportunity to bring up these ideas with your children. You can begin talking about families and what makes a family between television shows or after social gatherings with other children so that they can get the importance of family.

For your friends and other relatives, it is highly advisable to not let them know about your situation as a surrogate immediately. The best approach would be to let the pregnancy come up naturally in conversation. The more natural, confident, and happy you are about it, the more accepting they will be to you being a surrogate. If you are nervous and scared of their reaction, they may question your decision. Just remember that they won’t all accept or agree with your decision to become a surrogate mother and this should not affect you.

You should not fool yourself into believing that your pregnancy will not affect the people who are closest to you. It is vital for your family to be well prepared and supportive, and this is a very important aspect for your pregnancy to be a success. They need to fully understand that the baby is not going to be a member of your family. If you have children, you need to make them realize that they are not getting another brother or sister. They need to understand that you are merely providing a service for some couple who were not able to have a baby on their own. Surrogacy can be a very educational and socially expanding experience, not only for yourself and your family, but also your community.

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Should Pregnant Surrogates Eat Organic Foods?

Should Pregnant Surrogates Eat Organic Foods?

The goal shared by all intended parents and surrogate mothers is to produce a healthy baby. To ensure that the baby develops properly, it’s very important for the surrogate to eat healthily while she is pregnant. More and more, intended parents are going a step further by asking their surrogates to eat only organic foods. While some surrogates are reluctant to do this, others are entirely willing – after all, it may improve their own health.

As with any significant decision, though, there are pros and cons to be considered.

The downsides include that organic foods can be much more expensive than the same type of non-organically-produced foods. This is due to their higher cost of production. A surrogate may be more willing to eat organic foods if the intended parents offered to pay for the organic foods she eats.

A related issue to that is the fact that organic foods can also be harder to obtain; not every grocery store or supermarket has such a wide selection of organics. They’re a specialty item, after all, and surrogates with fewer options for food-shopping (in rural areas or small towns, for instance) may have trouble shopping for organic foods.

And of course, not every food is available organically. There’s a real possibility that a surrogate eating only organically may have to miss out on some of her favorite foods for the duration of her pregnancy.

There are convenience issues, too. Organics, due to their lack of preservatives, can spoil more easily – shorter shelf-lives, which require more regular shopping.

But there are a lot of good reasons that intended parents ask their surrogates to eat organic foods. Insecticides and additives are potentially harmful if they are passed though to the baby during pregnancy. Organic foods lack insecticides and additives – those things won’t be carried through into the baby.

Health concerns have, from time to time, been raised over genetically modified crops, or meat from animals that have been fed those crops. Organic food, by definition, is not genetically modified, which removes those concerns.

Research has shown, additionally, that organic foods contain more healthy vitamins and minerals, possibly due to the lack of preservatives involved.

And as a side-benefit, if you’re concerned about how animals are treated, organic food is a much better idea. Organic farming requires that animals be fed a natural diet, and are kept (unlike mass-produced ‘factory farm’ meat) in much more humane free-range conditions.

So while organic food can be inconvenient at times and more expensive, it also does provide a much healthier choice for the surrogate and the baby. It’s a big decision that should be weighed seriously from both sides, but there are solid reasons behind why a lot of intended parents do want their surrogate mothers to eat organically during their pregnancy.

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Important Things You Need to Know After IVF

Important Things You Need to Know After IVF

After an embryo transfer, a lot of tension and anxiety can happen. For first-time surrogates and intended parents, questions begin to linger in their minds – “Should I be on bed rest for the first two or three days?”, “What foods should I eat?”, “How active can I be during the two-week wait, and “Will our surrogate get pregnant?”

These questions are all important to comprehend, and advice can vary from doctor to doctor. The really important thing to remember is that there’s no guarantee of pregnancy through IVF – there are a lot of factors involved in the process.

Some common suggestions recommended by doctors are:

1. No heavy lifting for the first 48 hours after IVF transfer.

2. No strenuous physical activities like running or aerobics.

3. No alcohol, drugs or smoking.

4. No intercourse until a fetal heartbeat is determined.

5. Bed rest for the first two days after the IVF transfer.

It’s very important to remember that these instructions do differ between doctors.

As intended parents, if you want to be more sure that these instructions are followed, it might be helpful to assist – or have someone assist – your surrogate during the first two days after the IVF transfer. Run the errands that the surrogate needs done, prepare meals for her and her family, help with laundry and so forth.
The surrogate is likely to really appreciate your help while she’s on bed-rest, while you yourself would have peace of mind that the surrogate is following her doctor’s instructions.

In most cases, the transfer’s success is known after ten days. On the tenth day after the transfer, the surrogate goes back to the IVF clinic to see if the embryo has implanted into the uterus.

On Day 12 after the embryo transfer, the fertility clinic checks to see if the HcG (Human Chorionic Gonadotropin) level has doubled – if it has, then the embryo is properly growing.

The In Vitro Fertilization procedure is not 100% successful; not every embryo transfer will result in a pregnancy. In the event that it doesn’t, it’s important not to make any rash decisions until the intended parents have had an opportunity to discuss the outcome with the doctor.

The doctor may have some insight about why the transfer was a failure – poor embryo quality, poor uterine lining or genetic problems are all possibilities.

Surrogacy is never a certain process, and the better you understand it, the better you’ll be able to plan your next steps. Proper medical advice will help the intended parents understand the best way to move forward.

There are a lot of important aspects of surrogacy that need to be properly understood. Knowing them will help intended parents better comprehend the process of surrogacy.

The issue of bed rest after an IVF transfer is still under debate; so far, nothing has been proven. Remember, it’s at the discretion of your doctor to give all the necessary instructions to your surrogate – first and foremost, pay attention to your doctor’s advice.

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6 Tips on Choosing the Best Surrogate Pregnancy Pillow

6 Tips on Choosing the Best Surrogate Pregnancy Pillow

Because it’s so essential to be comfortable during your surrogate pregnancy, a pregnancy pillow is an important prenatal accessory.

Healthcare professionals recommend that women sleep on their left side with knees bent slightly, but many surrogate mothers find this sleep position uncomfortable. While a head pillow can support certain parts of the body, one specifically designed to support the whole body can be more comfortable during your surrogate pregnancy.

Here are six helpful tips on choosing the best pregnancy pillow:

1. Pinpoint the areas that are most stressful to you. Every surrogate mother’s pregnancy is different, with different aches and discomforts. Pregnancy pillows are specifically designed to alleviate all different types of stress, from hip pressure to back support. Figure out exactly what stresses are most bothersome and find the pillow designed for your needs.

2. Know the different types of pregnancy pillows. Maternity body pillows are available in a variety of options: full body memory foam pillows that adjust to the contours of your body; smaller pillows made to soothe and prevent specific problems like back, hip and upper shoulder pain; simple wedges that slide under your growing belly; and bean-shaped pillows that wrap around your mid-section.

3. Research the best type of maternity pillow. Ask friends and relatives; it’s best to ask someone who has been recently pregnant and use their comments as a guide on your choice of maternity pillows. There are also websites and magazines with reviews on specific products. Remember that personal reviews are the most honest opinion and a great guide for helping you narrow down your search.

4. Try and test your choices. A maternity pillow may feel differently when held snug against your body than it feels when you push it in with your hand. Most home and maternity stores allow you to touch, caress and even try their products. This will be one of the most important purchases you’ll make during your pregnancy, so it is best to take your time, try a few different options and decide which one is right for you.

5. Try a new sleeping position. If you’re used to sleeping on your back or front, then you’ll probably have a difficult time adjusting to the lump forming on your stomach, but you can get used to it. You can start by trying to fall asleep on your side in the early weeks and months of your pregnancy to give yourself a leg up in the adjustment phase. You should also start to use your maternity pillow before you feel like you need it, as your body will need some time to get used to this new product.

6. Don’t be cheap when comfort is concerned. Body pillows can be relatively expensive, especially when you get to the types that provide pinpoint relief to very specific problem areas. Remember that a durable pillow can be used again and many maternity pillows can be used post-pregnancy for nursing and cradling your new baby.

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Common Mistakes in Buying Maternity Clothes

Common Mistakes in Buying Maternity Clothes

When it comes to shopping for maternity clothes during your surrogate pregnancy, you need to consider comfort, practicality and affordability – after all, you don’t want to spend a fortune on something you’ll only wear for a few months.

Even if you’re only planning to buy a few items, you should be aware of the common mistakes many surrogate mothers make when buying maternity clothes. Here are a few of them:

Mistake One: Not Considering the Fabric.

When pregnant, your overall body shape and size will change; that’s what makes it so important to choose the right type of fabric for your clothes. Consider breathability, stretchniess, durability and softness – look for natural fabrics like cotton, modal and bamboo. Avoid clothing made from synthetic materials such as polyester; they retain heat, which can be uncomfortable when pregnant.

Also avoid clothes listed as wrinkle-free or permanent press; studies show that these materials are treated with chemicals like formaldehyde, which can be dangerous to pregnant women and their growing babies.

Mistake Two: Focusing on Price.

Maternity clothing can be expensive, but they’re an area where you definitely get what you pay for. Some pregnant women don’t consider this a problem – after all, they’ll only be wearing the clothes for at most nine months, right?

Unfortunately, most cheap maternity clothing doesn’t even last that long. They begin to tear and unravel after the first or second wash, and certainly won’t carry you through the entire pregnancy.

One way to save money is to only buy a few essential items, but make sure those items are good. Also consider second-hand items at resale shops, rummage sales or on eBay; while they may have been worn before, they’re still likely to have a lot of life for their low price.

Mistake Three: Not Planning Ahead

Most pregnant women don’t plan ahead – they don’t consider that during pregnancy, their body shape and size will gradually change. Buying everything in a single spree is usually a bad idea – think ahead and invest in quality pieces that’ll work for the duration of your pregnancy.

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